Why ‘Scamanda’ is Relevant to the Church

 

‘Scamanda’ is a popular four-episode docuseries on Hulu that was ranked as the streaming service’s number one show this past week. I came across it a couple of weeks ago and was transfixed by the story. Each episode captivated my attention. Conflicted thoughts abounded while I watched how Amanda Riley, a seemingly normal Christian mom who allegedly fell ill with cancer, deceived an entire church.

 

First, let’s acknowledge that her name is Amanda, and the fact that she began a blog in the midst of her “crisis” is an unfortunate coincidence.

 

Bleh. Okay, moving on.

 

Second, if you aren’t aware of the story or don’t like spoilers, you might want to stop reading and come back to this post once you have. Forming some original thoughts about the film before hearing someone else’s opinions is valuable too. There is a ton to process after watching, so if that’s you, feel free to pause. For those that have seen it or never plan to, let’s get to it.

 

There have been various docuseries in the past few years about spiritually abusive churches and leaders. Many of them tell the story of a pastor with unchecked power and control over a group of people. But this one fell outside the lines of the usual because Amanda Riley was neither a pastor nor a leader in the church. With that said, her supporters from the church spoke about the young mom much like someone raves about their pastor. It was obvious that she was idolized in her faith community and with that leverage she was able to spiritually manipulate an entire church for her benefit.

 

So why is this story worth paying attention to? 

 

I believe that ‘Scamanda’ uncovers some of the common threads and pitfalls that are happening in the church. It seems like every day we uncover another imposter. So how can we create safer churches? One of those ways is by being aware of how the wolves have learned to infiltrate the church. Let’s take a deeper look at what ‘Scamanda’ has to teach us.

 

A wolf often looks and talks like a sheep.

Watching this chick on the stage of her church speak assertively about her faith sent waves of shock through my brain. They reran the same clip of her speaking to the audience in each episode. It never got old. Every time they played that segment of the show, disbelief flooded my mind. She wore a modest salmon-colored dress with a jean jacket and a pleasant smile. Amanda Riley looked like any other mother of small children. Someone you would point your child to to get help if they ever got lost in a crowd. 

 

Then she spoke. She dug deep to explain spiritual truths she had “learned” while fighting her fake cancer; the crowd went wild. 

 

Hear me out on this, I don’t blame anyone in that congregation for not believing this sweet-looking woman, but the painful lesson we can learn is people who deceive can talk the talk. We tend to think that someone capable of telling bold-faced lies to an entire congregation to get their money wouldn’t know the Bible, or know how to use spiritual lingo. They do. They can and they do. And they fool us, a lot.

 

Leslie Vernick is a licensed clinical social worker and relationship coach. She has many helpful videos surrounding destructive relationships. I watched this five-minute video of hers called, Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing, a couple of years ago on how to distinguish a wolf from a sheep. It’s very helpful and I highly recommend watching it. After you do, think about if there were any signs in Amanda Riley’s life that she was indeed a wolf.

 

The power, influence, and money equation.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that this woman chose a megachurch to attend. It was said that every weekend, her church would reach about five thousand attendees, located in Silicon Valley nonetheless. Also, in the very first episode, it was explained that the pastor was known for “love offerings”, which is when each member is asked to donate $1 to specific people in their congregation that are facing various financial struggles. Amanda’s family was a beneficiary of one of these special offerings. Several scenes reenact the Sunday morning where tons of cash was laid at her and her husband’s feet. What an incredible, caring demonstration of love for those who are enduring serious hardship. That’s what my initial thought was. But a wolf doesn’t think like that. They think about how they can exploit these loving acts for their own selfish gain. And that is exactly what this woman did. 

 

I appreciate authors David Johnson and Jeff Van Vonderen’s metaphor of spiritually abusive systems being like traps, which is why I’ve mentioned them before in this post. They describe the types of people that fall prey to certain spiritually abusive systems in their book, The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse. But what if we flipped our thinking and pondered what types of individuals we are attracting to our pastoral and church leadership positions?

 

What types of benefits do the pastoral staff or church leadership receive in your church? Do they have all their coffee and restaurant bills covered by the church’s tithe as long as they are ministry-related? How much of the church’s donations go towards their traveling expenses? Who gets to say how much is a reasonable amount for each allocation? What are they allowed to write off on the church’s financial budget that primarily benefits them? I’m not saying they shouldn’t have any of these add-ons, what I am saying is…we should be careful what type of people we may attract to these positions. Be aware of how much your congregation is giving towards ‘the perks’.

 

If I wanted to set a trap for ants in my home, I would lure them with something sweet and tasty. If I wanted to catch a lost dog I might walk around the neighborhood with a jar of peanut butter. Can we honestly ask ourselves what we are luring into the pulpit and leadership positions when we dangle money, power, and unchecked influence? The modern church presents a lot of worldly benefits for pastors and leaders. How can we protect the position from the love of these things or from drawing in people who desire to exploit the church?

 

The cycle of denial and shame.

What was so interesting was how many of Amanda’s supporters were loyal, angry, and defensive, when concerns about her integrity began popping up. Some of them refused to meet with investigators and were completely insulted at the thought of their dear friend faking cancer. It’s an ugly accusation if it weren’t true, her accusers admitted that. Maybe some of her friends and supporters’ initial reaction had to do with their deep love for Amanda and her family. But later on, you could see how her empathetic donors held a lot of shame for not being able to see through her lies; for falling for it. Even when her actions so clearly contradicted her diagnosis, most of them didn’t catch it. 

 

In fact, there was only one brave person who saw something incongruent in Amanda Riley’s life and said something.

 

Anger is a common response when concerns surface about a pastor or church leader. Many in the community are impulsively defensive and even full of rage at the idea of their leader being accused of something wrong. Many stood confidently by her side up until the very moment Amanda admitted to lying. It was only then that her faithful supporters saw her for who she really was.

 

This visceral response causes me to wonder how much of our defensiveness has more to do with protecting our own understanding. Us not wanting to say, “I fell for it”. If we are not willing to pursue truth when accusations arise, then hopefully we never have to admit that we did not perceive being led along by a deceiver, manipulator, or abuser. Sometimes our reaction to accusations about the possibility of a disqualified leader says more about us than about what has or is taking place.

 

No one wants the wool pulled over their eyes, but listen sheep, it happens. The Bible speaks about this possibility because it has been a threat to the church for thousands of years. And yet, we continue to live as if that is not the case. 

 

In Acts 17, the Bereans received a shout-out from Paul because of how fervently they studied the word of God alongside Paul’s message of the gospel to check for accuracy. How often do you check your pastor or church leader’s teachings? Have you fallen into a pattern of just showing up because it’s Sunday morning? Does your church’s teachings and actions reflect the principles of the bible? When was the last time you looked closely at your church’s budget? How transparent is it and do you know where the numbers are going? How much money goes to help the poor and oppressed? Are the financial needs of the church congregation a priority? This information should be readily available to any church you are donating to.

 

Further, you can visit the website, Ministry Watch, to find the most recent list of nonprofits’ rankings based on their financial integrity.

 

Many of Amanda Riley’s supporters refused to confront her or believe that she was a thief which allowed her to continue to exploit them and many others for more money. For the ones that did ask a few more questions of her, they were pacified by surface-level excuses and never saw any actual proof. The damage done multiplied for everyone involved because she wasn’t held accountable.

 

What can we learn from this? Seeing these recurring themes in the church, what are some safeguards you can suggest to help us identify and even repel wolves from taking positions in the church? Do you think it’s possible?