Are you wondering what you can do to help those harmed by the church in your life?
Many times it is hard to know what to do. We fear we might do more damage than good so we resolve to stay away. I’ve done it myself. This can convey that we don’t care. And when God’s people don’t seem to care, it is very easy to conclude that God must not care. We often hope that the lost and limping will somehow or some way wander back into the fold, but instead, it is vital that we choose to be present.
While learning about spiritual abuse, many experts repeatedly highlighted Ezekiel 34. I was not familiar with the chapter before this point, but it has become a recurring balm to my heart. God addresses the mistreatment of his people by corrupt shepherds. He paints the picture of the serious injustice He is observing. He sees his sheep pushed out from the flock and wandering in the wilderness. Alone. Vulnerable to starvation and attack from wild animals and He responds. In verse 11 it says,
“For this is what the Sovereign Lord says: I myself will search for my sheep and look after them. As a shepherd looks after his scattered flock when he is with them, so will I look after my sheep. I will rescue them from all the places where they were scattered on a day of clouds and darkness.
A few verses later he says,
”I myself will tend my sheep and have them lie down, declares the Sovereign Lord. I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak…”
God is seen searching, finding, and patiently nursing his sheep back to health.
A lot of times our Christian lives are busy and bound up in the many programs of the church. If someone needs healing, a lot of times, our only consistent solution is if they can join us in the church’s weekly activities. While well-intentioned, this ignores the serious trauma that can prevent someone from being able to enter the doors of a church or participate in faith communities. Their trust may be too broken to be able to attend various church ministries.
We need better life-saving instruments for these dear souls who are in the ICU of the spiritual ward.
Many people have resolved to abandon their faith because God’s people have repeatedly minimized the harm done and have directed them back to triage. I can admit that often my biggest goal was to get these wounded hearts to visit a Sunday service, even if their life experience had taught them it is unsafe.
So, how do we learn to become agents of healing?
Christian Psychologist and spiritual abuse expert Diane Langberg says,
“In a survivor’s healing, victims of abuse need to tell their story. They may be afraid, slow to speak, uncertain of their words. But as we listen, and bear witness to their trauma we grant them dignity, safety, and comfort. Doing so is a reversal of the experience of trauma.”
If the Lord is our example, let’s go and meet them where they are at.
Let’s stop burying our heads in the sand of our comfortable spaces.
Let’s listen to their stories and learn what care means to them.
Let’s be patient and loving without our agendas and expectations of what their healing should look like.
Let’s keep showing up even when they don’t share our perspective.
Let’s keep learning.
